Last year (2006) was a very strange year... it was full of change, but it was also the best and worst time all rolled into one. This last year was all about choices and future. I was finishing sixth form. I had applied for uni and I had some sort of idea of what the future may have in store. However God had other plans, better plans. His plans are always to prosper and not to harm, yet I was still afraid. God was calling me into Officership with the Salvation Army. I wasn't sure if I wanted to do that. I wasn't sure if I could do that. I wasn't a leader. I had no authority or vision. I couldn't stand up and preach and teach a congregation! What was God thinking?
Yet God knew what He was doing! He provided people to help me through this time and people to shout at me 'When are you just going to accept it?' and finally I did. Finally I let God have the control over my life and finally I began to believe in this plan of His.
As soon as I begun to work on this plan, God gave me peace and a sense of purpose. But just as things were going well... boom things all fell to pieces. I had applied to uni and was praying that God would give me an answer to whether I was to go to uni before I took up Officership and God just kept giving me the answer and I kept listening, but other people did not believe me and wanted me to go. I was having arguments, losing people I love and all because of God's plan? What was going on? Well a wise person told me it was because I was obeying and Satan will try his very best to stop me. Yet again Jesus was there showing me the way, helping me and providing for me.
One night as I questioned and doubted again, I opened my Bible to Isaiah, to a passage that I liked. As I read I prayed 'Jesus use Your word. Give me something to cling onto throughout this bad time.' and He answered. I decided to read on a bit and found Isaiah 42, which was very encouraging. When I heard a noise and looked over I saw The Message. I knew that God was telling me to read it. When I opened it to Isaiah 42, I saw and read Isaiah 43:
'But now God's message... "Don't be afraid, I have redeemed you. I've called your name. You're mine. When you're in over your head, I'll be there with you. When you're in rough water's, you will not go down. When you're between a rock and a hard place, it won't be a dead end-Because I am God, your personal God, The Holy of Israel, your Savior. I paid a huge price for you: all of Egypt, with rich Cush and Seba thrown in! THAT'S how much you mean to me! THAT'S HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU! I'd sell off the whole world to get you back, trade the creation just for you. So don't be afraid: I'm with you."
It spoke so much to me and more when you put it into today's context. He also gave His only son's life to buy us back. It speaks of an amazing love that is for each one of us. It gave me hope and strength. I was not afraid anymore for Jesus is always with me. When I read that I knew that I had nothing to doubt. It was all God and it is all because HE LOVES ME!!!
Will you let Him love you?
No comments:
Post a Comment